Concept: “7/2008 Until The Cure”
Rationale: In recent years prior to my enrollment in the MFA BLR program, my work has been solely illustrative, followed a very specific formal process, as well as delineating from something that I have been dreading speaking on in my art for a while– which is my autobiographical relationship with Type 1 Diabetes.
The reasoning? My undergrad at MassArt was solely dedicated to exploring this thesis, and documenting my initial feelings and emotional roller coaster that was the 2008 diagnosis and catalyst for my work’s focus. I have been slowly indoctrinating myself within the commercialization of art since my graduation in 2012, and what the end goal of my “product” can be used for. It was time to tap into the practice of play, raw expression, and the language for which I feel I can express myself in the least contrived way possible– through fabric and cloth.
Details:
Artist Statement:
Who? Anyone interested becoming familiarized with the emotional aspects of the Diabetic condition, as well as the Diabetic Community
What? An autobiographical chapter of my physical and emotional journey with Diabetes through fabric.
Where? Currently as of now placed on the floor in the middle of my bedroom, but ideally in a large indoor space, with white walls and white flooring.
When?/Why? Yesterday! I wish I would have started this a long time ago, but I think the time of now seems better than ever due to the pandemic. Being anyone with a chronic condition during this time highlights the vulnerable state for which your vessel of a body really is, and so being able to express this was very cathartic. It was time to confront my vulnerability as physical being, but also to recognize my emotional resilience, resourcefulness and strength.
I wanted to express how something beautiful from afar, can actually be quite painful, repetitious and laborious in it’s development. I wanted to indiscriminately package my past 12 years of approximately 43,800 finger pricks, 22,995 self delivered injections, and 365 pump sites within something colorful, layered and rich with texture– tough, but with a touch of femininity. This piece is meant to communicate the unusual dichotomy of pain, and the quiet isolation of a resilient experience that usually bares no visibility to others.
How? Every structural decision in this piece was intentional, from the use of all synthetic fabrics, heat-set pleated nylons and polyester blends, the use of top- applied bias ruffles (where fabric is forced against their woven grain), the body itself being a traditional cascade, the selection of stitches, to the insulin pump tubing keeping this arrangement in it’s alignment. Traditional tailoring methods without the use of a sewing machine, in tandem with the non-traditional painterly language of this instillation, speaks to the daily tension that is my experience with this condition.
Artist References: Post my studio visit with Samnang Riebe I am very much interested in researching about some painters, as well as artists past and present who have worked with fabric and installation. I want to learn more about where this trajectory of work that I am making falls within the contexts of our contemporary art community, as well as within art history. Here where some artists that Sam had offered me as a starting point for my research: Ernest Neto, Sam Gilliam, and Sheila Pepe. Sam also mentioned making many quantities using the same visual language, to experience successes and failures in one lane of expression before moving onto another.